Origin Stories

Origin Stories
December 15, 2016 The Bro

A few weeks ago, I went on a “Grand Tour of the Pacific Northwest,” and decided to start this blog, for reals this time. The first time around was two years ago as I was packing up to move from Portland to Berkeley. I may have been under the influence at the time, but only in the way where all your ideas are THE BEST EVER. My fiancé, C, being far more practical than me at the moment, reminded me that it was a crazy time to start a blog: I was working and packing and moving away from all our friends and moving to our first place just the two of us and starting grad school. He was right, but my motivation really fizzled out when I couldn’t pick a good name.  Among my many blog ideas that were THE BEST EVER,  a name was not one of them.  Even my friends and family valiantly tried to come up with name ideas, but with little success.  Observe:

Sweet helpers, but no winners.

So the move happened, but the blog didn’t. Moving from Portland to Berkeley meant leaving our damp basement room in a 5-bedroom house of friends complete with yard, garden, and sometimes-koi-pond in the city we both love, in order to move to a cute 1-bedroom apartment complete with no outdoor space, no option to get a dog, and quadruple the rent in a city I kinda like and C sweetly tolerates.

In the two years since C and I moved, we’ve visited Portland a handful of times between us, but never together. So when we had the chance to take a trip to Washington, we decided to go all out and make a Grand Tour from Berkeley to Seattle to Victoria to Seattle to Portland to Berkeley again. The whole thing just solidified that I want:

(A) to live there

I mean seriously…

Come. On.

(B) to have a yard

A yard! With a grill! And with seasons! And with outdoor movie nights! (Photos from BFF-F and her yard)

(C) to get a dog.

There are at least 3 years before we leave the East Bay, so in the meantime, I’m working towards building a space I love to be in, rather than sitting around mentally bitching about all the things I’d like to change. Not to worry! There will still be plenty bitching! But I’m hoping to channel it towards projects I’ve been putting off and/or half-assing.

“But, that doesn’t sound ‘lazy’ at all!” you say. “How dare you call yourself ‘The Lazy Apartment’ when you’re talking about ‘working,’ ‘building,’ and ‘channeling-bitching-energy’?!”

“Well,” I say, “you’re thinking of just one kind of lazy. At the moment, I can think of at least two. You’re thinking of being lazy as ‘not doing much of anything at all’ (trust, this blog will also include plenty of that kind of lazy). But oftentimes, being lazy means getting shit done now, so that you can get back to ‘not doing much of anything at all’ in a nicer space OR so that the next time you have to use that space it’s less stupid than it was before.”

“I’m unconvinced! Give me an example! Paint me a word picture!”

“Easy. Sweeping the floor. For some (me most of the time), it’s lazier to just…not sweep. But if you get that shit done now (instead of waiting for weeks and weeks), you can sweep quickly, and then sit your ass down again and enjoy the view of the floors from your couch/bed/toilet (it’s a nicer space!). If youWhen I decide to just not sweep for weeks on end, and instead just wear flip flops around the house and wash your feet multiple times per day and run around dodging giant hair-tumbleweeds…this is when just sweeping would make the whole situation way less stupid.”

“Wow…you let your floors get really…really dirty.”

“Yep. And that’s nothing compared to the stupid mirror situation up in here. Stay tuned for that one.”

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